i think i can figure it out.

"are you thinking about your dinosaur life?"

some more vegas snips.

paris pool. sis, me, cuz.after show hangs at pink taco.

hotel pre-party with champagne. notice my sister in the background. ;]she makes me look bad. ;]XS at encore. casey, the fabulous jenna, me.jenna and me.

Blink-182's Mark Hoppus Grills Motion City Soundtrack About New LP - News Story | Music, Celebrity, Artist News | MTV News

Blink-182's Mark Hoppus Grills Motion City Soundtrack About New LP - News Story | Music, Celebrity, Artist News | MTV News

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need a little help to get me through it.

still too tired to post something epic and long. but will give you a few sweet snips of things.

pre-pool with the sister.

jenna brought a wide brimmed hat for my paleness. venetian pool.

awesome MCS press in AP magazine.

new MCS song debuted at the Vegas show.

my crappy phone video of the crowd clapping and singing along to MCS. unreal! stick with it to hear them sing.

the vegas?

went to see harry potter and the half-blood prince with justin the day after it opened. i adored it, obviously. i think the book is 10x better, and a lot of my favorite parts of the book were not in the movie, but overall the movie did a great job of setting up the last two movies. more importantly, luna had the best costumes and scenes (for such a minor character). we ran into murphy and gloria whilst waiting in line, so it was sort of a "double date" scenario, and was good to hang with some of my favorite people all in one area.

this past weekend i just hung out with justin and his sisters. low key = perfection.

wednesday night i fly to vegas!!! i am so jazzed. not for the city (that which i can do without), but for the people and the music adventure. thursday and friday i will be at the mcs/blink 182 show and the rest of the weekend i will be with my little sister, my cousin, and my uncle. mini family reunion!

quick:

• found the perfect shoes for my wedding get-up for jessica's wedding in august. quite pleased. it was stressing me out.
• watched the kingdom of heaven: director's cut, and loved it (in a very slow moving way).
• had my hair done. thank. god.
• packing for vegas currently. it is supposed to be in the 100s. UGH.
• ordered some spanx. is that lame i just admitted that? i am so excited! got it in the mail today. i am in lovvee.

here is a complimentary picture taken at justin's mom's birthday. hoorah!

i'm in love.

battered and braised, grilled and sauteed.

Well, well, well. I have decided to try proper capitalization and punctuation again. This will probably last a whopping one post. Enjoy it while it lasts.

The past two weeks, or so, have been a whirlwind of emotions, events, and words. I still hesitate to post on most of it (some of my own, some of others, some only involving me slightly). Know that "mine" is sorted out for the best--the very best. I am more content than ever (after several days of silent agony). Things are as they were, but stronger in many ways. "Others" is sorting out as we speak. I have been surprisingly impressed by some people's actions and strides to make everything work out. Hopefully it continues. "Sort of mine" is just straight up drama--some of which needed to happen, some of which is just entertaining, and some of which is totally unnecessary. Seems like the world is begging for us girls to have intense nights out these days. Every single time we have gone out, it has been wonderful chaos and dangerous riot fires.

Friday the girls all got together for what was supposed to be Amy's girl's night out, but she ended up needing to stay home. Heather, Lydia, Laura, and myself still ended up going to the Varsity to catch The Greycoats, Dan Rodriguez, and Ari Herstand play some tunes. There we ran into Kalgren, who had previously the denounced the "scene" and "scene-sters" but must have thought he was exempt from contamination this night, and his girlfriend, who is very nice. We also found Meg, and roped her into our little circle of women. Of course Amy (Ari's girlfriend), Allison (George's girlfriend), etc... were there. Good people all around. Later in the night Brian Shackle showed up, and Mo also showed up. Eventually we decided to get some drinkables and headed over to the Ugly Mug (of course). I drove, lost, in downtown Minneapolis at 1:00AM all by myself AND found my way. Amazing. My biggest fear, partly overcome. The rest of the night? Not so satisfactory. I will not divulge. Anyway, we all ended up going to Luce (of course) and ate our pizza bitterly. Regardless of the drama the night brought, my girls are wonderful. I never have a bad time with them. Never. And the aftermath was sorted out the next morning, which was a good thing.

Above: Sort of fish-eye. Below: Non-fish-eyeish.

Saturday I went with Justin to Shane Nelson's wedding. He is the man who directed and shot the Farewell Continental video in the post below. Genius. Right? The wedding was the most perfectly done wedding I have seen, in terms of what I would ideally like (although not sure if I would actually do, or if I will ever actually get married). He was married at the Arboretum. The ceremony was in a square garden outside. There was a string/flute three piece band. The guests stood, lining the walkway, and when Shane and then when Molly walked past it was very casual and comfortable. Very classy and beautiful, but still "real"--not a lot of show. I loved it. It was quick and then we all moved to another gardenish area where the reception was held inside a inn-type of thing. Justin and I ended up sitting with two other Justins he knows, and it was a wonderful time, considering I didn't really know anyone. Shane is one of the most witty, kind, and open people I have ever met. It was a privilege being able to witness a milestone in his life.

Photo of a Polaroid.

Sunday Justin invited me to his mother's birthday dinner at Moto (?) a Japanese restaurant. YUM. many small dishes of food. I totally adore his whole family and all of the "significants." Such a good bunch of personalities. After that we went to his place and watched a movie (Something Idaho? With River Phoenix?). I loved it! He was being a little turd, though, when I tried to explain one of the character's personalities to him (based off of my knowledge of a Shakespeare play). That punk. He is so cute when he is a punk.


In other news...

I am skinnier than I have been in ages.

I feel better about myself than I have in ages.

I am so totally stoked for Vegas coming up next weekend.

Who is excited for the new Harry Potter? This girl!

I am practicing how to smile in photos these days. I like my big natural smile, but sometimes I just want a good photo. So I am working on this. Lame, huh? Eh.

I have not watched television in at least a week, which makes me very happy.

I was, very luckily, able to listen to the new MCS roughs for the new album a few times. I am completely obsessed. I cannot get them out of my head. They are going to get so much credit as a band for this new record. I cannot wait for it to come out so everyone can fall in love with it as much as I have.

where he goes, i go.

let's put these weapons down.

i know, right? crazy. who are we???

what a trip. i'm glad we can... FINALLY... laugh about it. good for us. right?

i will write a lot in the near future, i think. but for now i have quite a lot on my mind. a lot to sort through. a post is coming. i am too scattered to write well right now. too unfocused.

on an entirely unrelated note: i have thought the same thing.

i get my ends and my beginnings mixed up too.

4th of july was the best time i have had in so, so long. all of blark hung out together for the first time in ages (outside of bars or venues). everyone came to my house to grill and enjoy the nice day. it was the best time i have seen us have in a long time. we all felt like we were in some other ideal little world. my heart was full all day and night.



after my house, we all headed downtown to see the fireworks from the rooftop of one of the minneapolis bars. then hotdish played. yum.my weekend was fabulous. i could not have asked for better.

there was a sad night.
there was a crazy night.

if you haven't heard about one or either of the news contained in those nights, then i hesitate to post it in such a public forum.

when you find out, you will find out.

for one i am heartsick, but mainly happy.
for the other i am very excited, and nothing less.

i will just say--i cried several times this weekend, but every single one of those times were when acts of love or kindness were shown toward me from friends, or when i felt like i was so happily blessed.

i am so blessed.

Things are getting worse, but I feel a lot better.

And the price of a memory
is the memory of the sorrow it brings.
And there is always one last light to turn out
and one last bell to ring.
And the last one out of the circus
has to lock up everything.