i wish we could start over. no. i think the beginning was perfect. i could have lived forever in the beginning. those first few weeks, where i swear i did not breathe. where we were teenagers again, anticipating our first kiss. you were nervous, measuring the stars between the span of your fingertips. i was trying to play it cool, hoping you would not see me smiling uncontrollably in the dark. i could have lived in those moments on my front porch. both of us wrapped in blankets, getting as close as we could to one another without revealing too much.